Halloween!

Halloween is approaching and a lot of cool children is always up to a trick or treat. This makes the kids happy in some way that we all celebrate this year by year. But what is really the essence of celebrating this kind of event and what makes special on this day?

During the 16th century the word Halloween is first indicated and represented by a Scottish variant of the fuller “ALL-Hallows-Even” (which means Evening), and that is the night before All Hallows Day. However, on 20th century the spelling was changed and was frequently used as “Hallowe’en” eliding the “v” and in fact shortening the word. But do you know that the phrase “All hallows” is actually originated in Old English, which means, “mass-day of all saints.”
A Halloween is actually an annual event usually observed during Christian Holiday, All Saint’s Day. Everyone is ought to make merry this festivity with different activities which include the trick or treating, attending costume parties, carving the jack-o-lanterns, bonfires, haunted attractions, watching horror films or telling ghost stories. The trick or treat in fact becomes the customary celebration for children on Halloween who goes out and wears costume and knocks on from house to house, asking for some treats like candy or money with the question, “Trick or Treat?”


The costume used for some instance are traditionally modeled after monsters such as witches, devils, ghosts and skeletons, but over the time the costume selection nonetheless include popular celebrities, fiction, and generic archetypes like princesses and ninjas.





The foodstuff in some way makes some sense in making the Halloween a special day. There are various types of foods that you can prepare for and making it more creative to look more delicious and pleasing to the eye. Some cooks make their preparation more artistic making it looks more likely a Halloween day. Here’s some photos of cupcakes, (got this over http://www.rachelray.com/) designed to match the Halloween.


arachnophobia cup cake

looks like a monster cookies




wicked witch cup cake

vampire bites cup cake

mummy dearest cup cake

franken cup cake


There are also some dog owners who dressed their pets with cool outfits… (see photos below: source: http://www.rd.com/)

Have Fun!!!!!

Papa's seizure

One midnight of October when I received a sms from my sister telling me that our papa is in the hospital for he had a seizure earlier that day. I was in a complete shock for this never happens to him in his entire life.

I was just home that time from a birthday party of a close friend. I came home earlier and was about to have an early sleep since I was so tired that day cleaning up the mess of my crib. I received a text from my younger sister and called her right then to know what is happening way back at Bicol. I cried and cried aloud that night and don’t know what exactly am I going to do. A friend called me out, and someone with a good heart ought to book me a flight for me to be home earlier the next day. Never thought of hitting the bed anymore for a sleep, I just waited for the dawn and the next thing I knew, I was already at the airport.

The ride was not great exactly for I was wondering how my papa is while lying at the hospital bed. I felt tears fell down every now and then from my cheek while my mind is flying out of the window. All along that flight, I was wishing then that all those worries will be taken by the cool wind and will stay out on clouds.

My papa did not recognize me when he sees me standing by beside his hospital bed. He asked me who I am. I can’t utter a word then and don’t know what to say. I clear out my throat and just simply say “papa?” I felt a bit squeeze from my heart, thinking why my papa did not even recognize me as her daughter. I just stared at him and repeatedly ask me who I am. I can’t merely find the right words to say when I just lit up my face and glance to where my Auntie is standing by as if I was looking for a help what to say. My Auntie responds in a soft way telling him “it was Lynn-Lynn, she came home for you.” I felt tears surrounds my eyes and was ready to fell but I hold them back knowing that I don’t wanna be so emotional by that time. Papa asked why I was home in no time, I sweetly told him because he was there at the hospital lying badly because of seizure and he needs to stop drinking liquor from the time he will be out. I told him too that I can’t stop crying at my pad and can’t wait to see him till I knew that he is already fine.

He told me that he felt he was already dying and can’t bear the pain he was feelin’ with those injections and oxygen he has on his body. I gently lay a hand on his head crying out that he would be fine and he will be out of that bed soon. I also told him that he needs some changes on his lifestyle or if not and that happens again, we’ll be sorry for ourselves because of losing him and I don’t want it to happen. I’m not even ready losing a father and I guess, I will never be ready for that. Ever…

Papa never had an attack ever since, that’s why it was a big deal to all of us seeing him like that. He was drunk the whole night, never had a proper meal the next day and that’s when the sodium on his body fails down that brought him to a quiet serious seizure. He was diagnose too with a damage on his liver that can lead to cirrhosis; and aside from that his prostate cancer is starting out now. Because the alcohol reacts to medicines that were injected to his body, he can’t remember what happened, he can’t remember what he said, and he forgot to recognize those people whom he talked with.

We all almost loose him that time; and I’m not really badly ready to lose him. Not now, not tomorrow, not ever… He is a one great father to me though were not that close to each other. I can’t perfectly explain what the feeling is, but I know, I really can’t handle it. I prayed and prayed to God not to get him from us for I can’t imagine what will happen if I let him go… A month ago Amiga just loosed a mother, and when I saw her cried for a time I really can’t figure out if that thing happens to me.

Losing someone you love is not easy. Letting go is the hardest thing or the last thing that you will always do. The emotional distraction could barely left a huge pain into our hearts, but if time calls you will always need to do the acceptance. In my case, I really can tell, not now………………. Love deeply those people you have around. You’ll never know when that fuckin’ time calls and it might be too late for us to say and show how we really love them…

Top 10 Mysterious World Landmarks

I found this over the net, the Top 10 Mysterious World Landmarks. Wanna share it here so you guys would barely know about this too! :D

The world is filled with ancient monuments built by master craftsmen in order to honor everything from kings and presidents to religious figures. And although most of these landmarks have been carefully studied and researched by scientists and historians, some are simply so old, incomplete, or obscure that we still dont know very much about why they were built or what purpose they served. The following are 10 world landmarks that, whether by intention or simply due to the passage of time, continue to baffle the people who study them.

10. The Cahokia Mounds

Cahokia is the name given to an Indian settlement that exists outside of Collinsville , Illinois . Archeologists estimate that the city was founded sometime around 650 AD, and its complex network of burial grounds and sophisticated landscaping prove that it was once a thriving community. It has been estimated that at its peak the city was home to as many as 40,000 people, which would have made it the most populous settlement in America prior to the arrival of the Europeans. The most notable aspect of Cahokia today are the 80 mounds of earth, some as high as 100 feet, which dot the 2,200-acre site. These helped create a network of plazas throughout the city, and it is believed that important buildings, like the home of the settlements chief, were built on top of them. The site also features a series of wooden posts that archeologists have dubbed woodhenge. The posts are said to mark the solstices and equinoxes, and supposedly figured prominently in the communitys astronomical mythology.

The Mystery
Although scientists are constantly discovering new information about the Cohokia community, the biggest mystery that remains is which modern Indian tribe is descended from the residents of the ancient city, as well as just what it was that caused them to abandon their settlement.

9. Newgrange

Considered to be the oldest and most famous prehistoric site in all of Ireland , Newgrange is a tomb that was built from earth, wood, clay, and stone around 3100 BC, some 1000 years before the construction of the pyramids in Egypt . It consists of a long passage that leads to a cross-shaped chamber that was apparently used as a tomb, as it contains stone basins filled with cremated remains. The most unique feature of Newgrange is its careful and sturdy design, which has helped the structure remain completely waterproof to this day. Most amazing of all, the entrance to the tomb was positioned relative to the sun in such a way that on the winter solstice, the shortest day of the year, the rays from the sun are channeled through the opening and down the nearly 60 foot passageway, where they illuminate the floor of the monuments central room.

The Mystery
Archeologists know Newgrange was used as a tomb, but why and for who still remains a mystery. The painstaking design needed to guarantee that the yearly solstice event occurs suggests that the site was held in high regard, but other than the obvious hypothesis that the sun featured prominently in the mythology of the builders, scientists are at a loss to describe the true reason for Newgranges construction.

8. The Yonaguni Monument

Of all the famous monuments in Japan , perhaps none is more perplexing than Yonaguni, an underwater rock formation that lies off the coast of the Ryuku Islands . It was discovered in 1987 by a group of divers who were there to observe Hammerhead sharks, and it immediately sparked a huge amount of debate in the Japanese scientific community. The monument is made up of a series of striking rock formations including massive platforms, carved steps, and huge stone pillars that lie at depths of 5-40 meters. There is a triangular formation that has become known as the turtle for its unique shape, as well as a long, straight wall that borders one of the larger platforms. The currents in the area are known for being particularly treacherous, but this has not stopped the Yonaguni monument from becoming one of the most popular diving locations in all of Japan .

The Mystery
The ongoing debate surrounding Yonaguni centers on one key subject: is the monument a natural phenomenon, or is it man-made? Scientists have long argued that millennia of strong currents and erosion have carved the formations out of the ocean floor, and they point to the fact that the monument is all one piece of solid rock as proof that it was not assembled by a builder. Others, though, point to the many straight edges, square corners and 90-degree angles of the formation as proof that its artificial. They often cite one formation in particular, a section of rock that resembles a crude carving of a human face, as evidence. If they are right, then an even more interesting mystery presents itself: who constructed the Yonaguni Monument , and for what purpose?

7. The Nazca Lines

The Nazca lines are a series of designs and pictographs carved into the ground in the Nazca Desert , a dry plateau located in Peru . They cover an area of some 50 miles, and were supposedly created between 200 BC and 700 AD by the Nazca Indians, who designed them by scraping away the copper colored rocks of the desert floor to expose the lighter-colored earth beneath. The lines have managed to remain intact for hundreds of years thanks to the regions arid climate, which sees it receive little rain or wind throughout the year. Some of the lines span distances of 600 feet, and they depict everything from simple designs and shapes to characterizations of plants, insects, and animals.

The Mystery
Scientists know who made the Nazca Lines and how they did it, but they still dont know why. The most popular and reasonable hypothesis is that the lines must have figured in the Nazca peoples religious beliefs, and that they made the designs as offerings to the gods, who would ve been able to see them from the heavens. Still, other scientists argue that the lines are evidence of massive looms that the Nazcas used to make textiles, and one investigator has even made the preposterous claim that they are the remnants of ancient airfields used by a vanished, technologically advanced society.

6. Goseck Circle

One of the most mysterious landmarks in Germany is the Goseck Circle , a monument made out of earth, gravel, and wooden palisades that is regarded as the earliest example of a primitive œsolar observatory.� The circle consists of a series of circular ditches surrounded by palisade walls (which have since been reconstructed) that house a raised mound of dirt in the center. The palisades have three openings, or gates, that point southeast, southwest, and north. It is believed that the monument was built around 4900 BC by Neolithic peoples, and that the three openings correspond to the direction from which the sun rises on the winter solstice.

The Mystery
The monuments careful construction has led many scientists to believe that the Goseck Circle was built to serve as some kind of primitive solar or lunar calendar, but its exact use is still a source of debate. Evidence has shown that a so-called œsolar cult� was widespread in ancient Europe . This has led to speculation that the Circle was used in some kind of ritual, perhaps even in conjunction with human sacrifice. This hypothesis has yet to be proven, but archeologists have uncovered several human bones, including a headless skeleton, just outside the palisade walls.

5. Sacsayhuaman

Not far from the famous Inca city of Machu Picchu lies Sacsayhuaman, a strange embankment of stone walls located just outside of Cuzco . The series of three walls was assembled from massive 200-ton blocks of rock and limestone, and they are arranged in a zigzag pattern along the hillside. The longest is roughly 1000 feet in length and each stands some fifteen feet tall. The monument is in astonishingly good condition for its age, especially considering the regions propensity for earthquakes, but the tops of the walls are somewhat demolished, as the monument was plundered by the Spanish to build churches in Cuzco . The area surrounding the monument has been found to be the source of several underground catacombs called chincanas, which were supposedly used as connecting passageways to other Inca structures in the area.

The Mystery
Most scientists agree that Sacsayhuaman served as a kind of fortress of barrier wall, but this has been disputed. The strange shape and angles of the wall have led some speculate that it may have had a more symbolic function, one example being that the wall, when seen next to Cuzco from above, forms the shape of the head of a Cougar. Even more mysterious than the monuments use, though, are the methods that were used in its construction. Like most Inca stone works, Sacsayhuaman was built with large stones that fit together so perfectly that not even a sheet of paper can be placed in the gaps between them. Just how the Incas managed such expert placements, or, for that matter, how they managed to transport and lift the heavy hunks of stone, is still not fully known.

4. The Easter Island Moai

One of the most iconic series of monuments in the Pacific islands is the Moai, a group of huge statues of exaggerated human figures that are found only on the small, isolated island of Rapa Nui , or Easter Island . The Moai were carved sometime between 1250 and 1500 AD by the islands earliest inhabitants, and are believed to depict the peoples ancestors, who in their culture were held in the same regard as deities. The Moai were chiseled and carved from tuff, a volcanic rock that is prevalent on the island, and they all feature the same characteristics of an oversized head, broad nose, and a mysterious, indecipherable facial expression. Scientists have determined that as many as 887 of the statues were originally carved, but years of infighting among the islands clans led to many being destroyed. Today, only 394 are still standing, the largest of which is 30 feet tall and weighs over 70 tons.

The Mystery
While there is a fairly solid consensus on why the Moai were erected, how the islanders did it is still up for debate. The average Moai weighs several tons, and for years scientists were at a loss to describe how the monuments were transported from Rano Raraku, where most of them were constructed, to their various locations around the island. In recent years, the most popular theory is that the builders used wooden sleds and log rollers to move the Moai, an answer that would also explain how the once verdant island became almost totally barren due to deforestation.

3. The Georgia Guidestones

While most of the mysterious monuments on this list only became that way as centuries passed, the Georgia Guidestones, also known as American Stonehenge, are one landmark that was always intended to be an enigma. The monument, which consists of four monolithic slabs of granite that support a single capstone, was commissioned in 1979 by a man who went by the pseudonym of R.C. Christian. A local mason carefully crafted it so that one slot in the stones is aligned with the sun on the solstices and equinoxes, and one small hole is always pointed in the direction of the North Star. Most interesting, though, are the inscriptions on the slabs, which an accompanying plaque describes as œthe guidestones to an Age of Reason.� In eight different languages, the slabs offer a strange ten-point plan to ensure peace on Earth that includes vague proclamations like œprize truth“beauty“love“seeking harmony with the infinite,� to very specific commands like œmaintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature.� Comments like this one have made the Guidestones one of the most controversial landmarks in the United States, and they have long been protested and even vandalized by groups that would like to see them demolished.

The Mystery
For all their controversy, very little is known about who built the Guidestones or what their true purpose is. R.C. Christian claimed he represented an independent organization when he commissioned the landmark, but neither he nor his group has spoken up since its construction. Since the monument was built during the height of the Cold War, one popular theory about the groups intentions is that the Guidestones were to serve as a primer for how to rebuild society in the aftermath of a nuclear holocaust.

2. The Great Sphinx of Giza

Sphinxes are massive stone statues that depict the body of a reclining lion with the head and face of a human. The figures are found all over the world in different forms, but they are most commonly linked with Egypt , which features the most famous example in the form of the Great Sphinx of Giza. Incredibly, the statue is carved out of one monolithic piece of rock, and at 240 feet long, 20 feet wide, and 66 feet tall, it is considered to be the biggest monument of its kind in the world. Historians largely accept the function of the Sphinx to have been that of a symbolic guardian, since the statues were strategically placed around important structures like temples, tombs, and pyramids. The Great Sphinx of Giza appears to be no different. It stands adjacent to the pyramid of the pharaoh Khafra, and most archeologists believe that it is his face that is depicted on that of the statue.

The Mystery
Despite its reputation as one of the most famous monuments of antiquity, there is still very little known about the Great Sphinx of Giza. Egyptologists might have a small understanding of why the statue was built, but when, how, and by who is still shrouded in mystery. The pharaoh Khafra is the main suspect, which would date the structure back to around 2500 BC, but other scientists have argued that evidence of water erosion of the statue suggests that it is much older and perhaps even predated the dynastic era of the Egyptians. This theory has few modern adherents, but if true it would mean the Great Sphinx of Giza is even more mysterious than previously believed.

1. Stonehenge

Of all the worlds famous monuments, none has gained as much of a reputation for pure, simple mystery as Stonehenge . Stonehenge has been inspiring debate among scholars, scientists, and historians since the Middle Ages. Located in the English countryside, the landmark is believed to date back to 2500 BC, and consists of several mammoth pieces of rock arranged and piled on top of one another in what appears at first to be a random design. The site is surrounded by a small, circular ditch, and is flanked by burial mounds on all sides. Although the rock formations that still remain are undoubtedly impressive, it is thought that the modern version of Stonehenge is only a small remnant of a much larger monument that was damaged with the passing of time, and it is largely believed that the building process was so extensive that it could have lasted on and off for anywhere from 1500 to 7000 years.

The Mystery
Stonehenge has become renowned for puzzling even the most brilliant researchers, and over the years the many gaps in the history of its construction, the nature of its use, and the true identity of its builders have become known as The Mystery of Stonehenge. The Neolithic people who built the monument left behind no written records, so scientists can only base their theories on the meager evidence that exists at the site. This has led to wild speculation that the monument was left by aliens, or that it was built by some eons-old society of technologically advanced super-humans. All craziness aside, the most common explanation remains that Stonehenge served as some kind of graveyard monument that played a role in the builders version of the afterlife, a claim that is backed up by its proximity to several hundred burial mounds. Yet another theory suggests that the site was a place for spiritual healing and the worship of long dead ancestors.

I nEed a Halo

If only I have the guts to tell a friend what’s really happening, I would. If only I have the courage to say how I’m feeling with my life this time, I’ll never hesitate to sit beside her and tell the story for a time.

I’m so confuse with life this time. Feeling bored, lost and so down that I’m loosing my self-esteem once again. Everyday that I seem to get up from bed is a hard time for me. I encounter laziness and always saying hello to boredom. What a day! I didn’t even think of something new that will make my morning better and for the rest of the day, rather I saw sadness.

There is something bothering me, I know… and something is wrong with me. I used to ask myself if I’m ok… I say “yes” but deep down I know I’m not. I know there is something wrong. I can figure it out but I refuse those reasons. Nothing is motivating me at all to live with this simple life. I want to move out, to look forward for a better life beyond those stupid things that just happened to me. I rely on a bottle of beers before I can go to sleep. This isn’t normal I know. This is wrong. But this is just the way I can set myself for a good sleep. It’s hard to simply deal with life if you’re in denial of something that you feel. I can barely smile, but I can’t deny the real emotions that I have inside. I’m not happy. I’m no longer comfortable in a world that I’m moving in.

I want something new; I want something that would change my life. Something that I can tell that life is not full of shit. I know there is huge good thing ahead of me. I hope I can still wait. I’m asking patience to stay longer. I don’t wanna see the time ending my life out of nothing, again.

I need a Halo.

San Miguel Island on a Black Saturday

Just got the time to make this meme, been busy with life…

Holy week was so good. For two years of my stay in Manila, I never had the chance to visit Bicol to spend my holy days since I used to choose it to be on other places to commemorate the event. Now this time, I really grab the chance to be home and spend it with the family.

I traveled on a Holy Thursday and was home at seven in the evening. Just had some dinner and headed for a good rest in my daddy’s bedroom. I spent my Good Friday with the whole fam and cousins, played with my nephew (orange) until I let him cry, hahaha! We we’re about to watch the “prusisyon” but the crowd make me feel so dizzy that I can’t handle myself from so much pushing and heat. But then, Black Saturday was so awesome that we all planned to cross San Miguel Island for a gathering.

San Miguel however can be found at the end of the strip of islands in the Lagonoy Gulf located in the province of Albay. And proud to say, it is still a part of Tabaco City (Ciudad nin Pagkamoot). The beach though is full of sea grasses, you can still be grateful for the beauty of it where you can also see starfish around, corals, dead corals and other fine stuff at the sea.

I appreciate the island so much. God’s hands are really amazing in creating the nature. Since I am a nature lover, I really memorized every single thing that I can see around. We had so much fun at the beach, and feel so fine that I spend that day with the whole family. Easter Sunday was a church day and a rest, for the next day is a time to be back to a place where I must be.

8 DatiNg MistAkes EvEn SmArt WomEn MakE

So funny that I’ve catch this article from yahoo site. It’s so weird that I can relate with it, damn! But then, I was trying to figure out some of these things… and I can tell, yeah right!

Now girls, read!



Dating Mistake #1:

Being Too Available

We’re not suggesting you play games, but we are telling you to indulge your passions and resist the urge to abandon your social circle every time your new man sends an invitation. Take Sebastian, 34, from Chicago, for example: “When I was single, there were women I initially liked who seemed to be waiting by the phone for me to call, which let me know if I didn’t meet someone else I wanted to date, I had a standby. There just wasn’t anything to work for, and that turned me off,” he says. The more you engage in and enjoy your life, the more he’ll work to be a part of it.


Dating Mistake #2:

Trying to Rehabilitate a Bad Boy

Ending a relationship is rarely easy, and though flying solo might not be your long-term goal, being on your own is better than feeling alone in a relationship with someone who treats you poorly. Even when it might be tempting to give a toxic romance one more try, knowing when to cut your losses and move on leaves you available and baggage-free when the right guy comes along.


Dating Mistake #3:

Looking for Perfection

Encouraging you to settle isn’t our style, but separating your desires from your deal-breakers can give your love life a major upgrade. “There are some qualities that your mate must have—being honest, for example—and others, such as movie-star looks, that should be thrown in the would-be-nice category,” says Elizabeth R. Lombardo, Ph.D., author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness. “Sit down and realistically figure out what characteristics are nonnegotiable and then be open-minded about the rest.”


Dating Mistake #4:

Feeling Sorry for Yourself

Resist the urge to bemoan your single status (which will only make him wonder why you find yourself such terrible company) and use this time to date yourself. Taking a dance class at the local studio, hitting up the exhibit you have been aching to see and trying out the new wine bar on the corner will not only offer you the chance to have more fun but will also leave you more likely to meet someone who shares your interests. So much better than sitting in your apartment waiting for someone to “wink” at your online profile picture, isn’t it? Another bonus? You’ll have far more interesting things to talk about over dinner than what your boss made you do on your lunch break last Friday.


Dating Mistake #5:

Knowing His Thread-Count Before You Know His Phone Number

Getting it on with a sexy stranger is your natural-born right, but according to many guys, it can be the wrong move if you’re looking for long-term love.
Follow the advice of super-sexy leading man Gilles Marini (he was Samantha’s sexy neighbor in Sex and the City: The Movie): “Men love women who respect themselves and who do not rush into bed with them but instead go on a few dates, where they can start to gain an understanding of each other and then decide whether or not to take things further. Women need to know that taking it slow and getting to know one another is the best way to get into a good relationship,” he says.


Dating Mistake #6:

Being Too Selfish in Your Relationship
One of the downsides of being independent is that it can lead to some self-absorbed tendencies—a huge turnoff for men looking for a serious relationship, says Ming Gregory, a professional matchmaker at Color Blind International Dating Service. So make sure you’re giving as much as you’re receiving in your next relationship. “A partnership involves two people who share mutual interests and mutually benefit one another,” she says. “It’s not just about what being with him can provide you; it’s about how you can come together to complement each other.”


Dating Mistake #7:

Believing in The One

“A lot of women make dating more difficult by placing so much pressure on themselves to find the one-and-only-man-in-a-billion they believe is right for them,” says Ali, 35, from Gaithersburg, Maryland.Instead of convincing yourself the ex you dumped was your soul mate or that perfect-but-married co-worker was your one that got away, take a cue from our male counterparts and approach the dating scene with the idea that there are plenty of men who are capable of making you laugh, sharing your values and melting your heart, and you’re going to have fun with several of them until you find one worthy of your commitment.


Dating Mistake #8:

Forgetting Your Manners

We can’t imagine this is something you’d ever do, but a little reminder never hurts: Say thank you.“Good manners have become so old-fashioned that men now wait for the thank-you at the end of the date as a way to see if she’s worth seeing again,” says Brian, 30, from New York City. “I don’t care if the woman looks like Kate Beckinsale and has a Ph.D.; if she can’t be bothered to utter those two little words, I am never calling her again.”




by Glamour Magazine, on Thu Apr 15, 2010 7:57am PDT

5 Signs He Isn't Over His Ex

Have some time to read...got this over the net and wanna share it.

whew, just dealing with the same damn problem!




How to tell if a guy is still hanging onto his old relationship – and what you can do to help him move on.

Do you ever get the feeling that there are three people in your relationship – you, your guy and his ex? Does he still talk or email with her often? Or maybe he holds an unhealthy grudge, or seems preoccupied with what she’s doing now? If any of these scenarios sound familiar, it may mean that he hasn’t completely let go yet. How can you tell if he’s not really over his ex? Tina B. Tessina, PhD, psychotherapist and author of Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting About the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage offers five warning signs:

1. He wasted no time before jumping into his next relationship. If you started dating this guy shortly after his latest breakup, there’s a good chance he’s not completely over his ex – no matter what he says. “There are hopes and dreams we have when we get into a relationship that we lose when we lose that relationship,” says Tessina. “It takes some time [to get over those things].” She points out that men often avoid the grieving process that follows a breakup, even though it can be instrumental in helping them assess the relationship and move on. “You want to be sure he can talk about it – that he can analyze it a little bit, and can say what went wrong and what went right and what part he played in what went wrong.” But even if he isn’t quite there, it doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed. As Tessina explains, “It just means you need to understand that he still has some processing to do, and he’s probably going to do some of it with you.”

Read Should You Friend Exes on Facebook?
2. He fell for you before his relationship ended. These are men like John Edwards and Tiger Woods, who tell you their previous relationships are over or broken, but they still go home to their wives or girlfriends. It sounds obvious, but these guys are bad news. “It doesn’t matter if he says the relationship is bad,” Tessina says. “He has a cheating mentality.” And if he cheats on her, he probably wouldn’t have a problem with cheating on you. Even if he does eventually leave his wife or girlfriend – a very big if, by the way -- and you’re willing to give it a go with this guy, he literally hasn’t had any time on his own to process the demise of that previous relationship so you could run into the same problems as in #1, above. Bottom line: This is probably not someone you want to be with.

3. When it comes to his ex, he only deals in extremes. If your new guy can’t say his ex’s name without spitting, this is another warning sign. “If he’s talking about her constantly, and she’s either the most wonderful thing in the world or the most terrible thing in the world, but it’s unrealistic, you need to ask him about his role in the relationship,” says Tessina. There are two people in every couple, and there’s no way his ex was as great or awful as he makes her sound. “If he’s not talking about it at all, you need to say ‘I think it’s valuable to for us to talk about our past relationships so we can see what went wrong and what we need to do differently in this relationship.’”

4. He can’t break the string. There are plenty of reasons a guy may stay in touch with his ex, and they aren’t necessarily all bad. “If they have kids in common, they have to be in contact,” Tessina says. “If they were together for a long, long time, there’s also some reason for contact.” But if neither situation applies, and he still won’t stop talking to his ex, you should initiate a conversation about her – carefully. “What you don’t want to do is set yourself up against his ex,” says Tessina. Here, too, she recommends talking to him about his relationship with his ex, and what he thinks he can do better or differently in your relationship. She also suggests offering to reach out to the ex yourself, but if he’s not up for that – and if he doesn’t seem compelled to change anything about the current situation, even if it’s making you uncomfortable – that’s a major red flag. “I would slow the relationship down immediately [in those circumstances],” she says. “I’d say, ‘I can’t go further if you’re going to have a relationship with somebody that has to be behind my back.’”

Read 5 Signs He’s Not the Guy For You
5. He obsesses over the remnants of the relationship. If he’s always checking her Facebook profile or you catch him poring over old pictures, you could also have a problem. “He’s not finished, he hasn’t done his grieving,” says Tessina. “You have to understand that if you stay in a relationship with him, you’re going to be part of that grieving process.” As Tessina points out, when you’re in a relationship you talk about just about everything. Whether it’s work, friends or family, there’s always something to discuss over dinner, and past relationships should be no different. Let him know you’re open to talking about his exes. Discussing this relationship could help him work through his feelings and move forward – and may even bring the two of you closer together.

If your guy hasn’t completely let go of his ex, proceed with caution – but know that your relationship isn’t necessarily a lost cause. He may want to be with you, but needs just a bit more time to deal with his breakup. The key to making it work is both of you being willing to talk openly about his old relationship and his feelings about his ex. And if, when all is said and done, he just can't let go, you may have to be the one who moves on.


* BettyConfidential.com, on Mon Apr 12, 2010 5:00am PDT.

Villa Christina

Remembering the times when I was in high school, I enjoyed so much having and making friends with anyone. I got different sets of friends but there’s one thing that I always assure of, is to treat them equally without choosing who’d be my favorite or not. With individual differences, I used to thank that I can deal with them kindly and fairly without hiding my true personality from them, and that they can accept who the hell is “me!”

We’re all grown up and now we’re on our 30’s, we still manage to see each other even for a little time just to share how life was and what’s going on now and then. Beyond the busy schedule’s we usually gather ourselves and have some time to unwind, relax, and laugh.

Clark Cresencia (one of our classmates) who’s from Dubai meets us and treats us for a luxurious and awesome night swimming to Christina Villa at Antipolo, City. The Christina Villa is one of the most remarkable resorts in the city where most people come to spend some time for their vacation and enjoys life for a split of second with friends or with family. The Villa for some instance has a nice spot overlooking the city where you can most appreciate it especially at night. It has a mini park where anyone can enjoy taking up pictures for a memory after, a two huge pool where you can swim freely and splash on water as long as you want.

Just the three of us (grace, I, and Nestor) showed up for Clark, we got lots of foods, more stories shared, laughter, and pictures. But then, I can tell that the moment was gratefully appreciated and joyous enough for us to leave a memory for life.